I was caught off guard by a question. A question I didn’t expect to come between “Hi’s “and “How are you?” plus those silly topics and so it really took me a while to answer it.
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WERE ABLE TO SAY THAT YOU’RE REALLY OVER ME?
My heart pounded like crazy but my mind felt like it stopped working. After a few seconds, I’ve realized there were tears in my eyes. I tried to answer the question, I scanned every corner of my mind looking for that moment when I was able to say that I have moved on or at least the time when I’ve ‘decided’ that I’m fine. I couldn’t remember.
All I know was, the last time I saw him I wasn’t over him. It was last year, a night out with him and the new girl of his life. (Yes, I know…it was totally masochistic to a agree to hang out with them.) Anyway,this was the only thing that came up when I tried to look for the answer in my head. So I told him about it but added “then a few months after that I was okay already.”
So there…I said it. After a few months since I saw him, I was over him. I think he believed my answer. Good. Now, why can’t I convince myself with that answer.
I doubt myself that I’m truly over him.Maybe the real question here is “HAVE I REALLY MOVED ON?”